There was a wine-tasting event held in the lobby of the Flint Institute of Arts over the weekend. I was passing through for an art movie so I missed the fun. The party was still rocking as the film ended as my wife ducked quick-like into the john for some post-movie relief. Ten seconds later and she's back out, and any guy who's married knows damn well that it's impossible for a woman to take a leak, wash up, touch-up, check her phone, and generally waste time in under five minutes let alone ten seconds, so what gives? Turns out that a wine-taster was blowing her guts out in great grape-infused gouts into one of the sinks. One security guard was clearing the bathroom (hence the unprecedented ten-second turn-around) while another was heard to say "ma'am, you've consumed too much wine and we're going to have to ask you to leave the premises." Sounds like it was a canned speech written by the PR director with the intent of indemnifying the museum while not overtaxing the vocabulary of the Cultural Center security detail.