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gullycanyon wrote:This thread is funny. For all the stuff our dads said to us, tried to get us to understand, and wanted us to learn, about life, from them, what the fuck do we all remember?

The cursing.

My dad (this will come as no fucking surprise to those of you who have read any of my posts) was a heavy curser. Some of his favorites have appeared in this thread, but he had one which I have never heard from anyone else:

"Go piss up a rope."

Dad used to say that too.

M.A.F., that's interesting, 'cuz "couldn't find his ass with both hands" was one of my dad's big-time faves.

Hhmm. I always wanted a sister, but I didn't think I had one...

gullycanyon wrote:M.A.F., that's interesting, 'cuz "couldn't find his ass with both hands" was one of my dad's big-time faves.

Hhmm. I always wanted a sister, but I didn't think I had one...

Dad was a cop. I'm sure he got around some.

I see. I guess you're not my sister.

what I will shorthand as "J F C!" always made me cringe a bit, particular if I had friends around.


"there's NO fish in that river..." every Thanksgivng at the Cannon lodge near Baldwin Michigan...Pere Marquette River.

gullycanyon wrote:M.A.F., that's interesting, 'cuz "couldn't find his ass with both hands" was one of my dad's big-time faves.

Hhmm. I always wanted a sister, but I didn't think I had one...

The cousin to "Doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground."

When my youngest sister was learning to talk, us older sibs, all at least six years older than her, would ask "What does Daddy say?" She would say "Shit" and there would be big laughs all around every time. I guess at some point that little show became unacceptable.

The Beav wrote:

gullycanyon wrote:M.A.F., that's interesting, 'cuz "couldn't find his ass with both hands" was one of my dad's big-time faves.

Hhmm. I always wanted a sister, but I didn't think I had one...

The cousin to "Doesn't know his ass from a hole in the ground."

Cross post from Shit My Dad Said(Says) to Shit My Drill Sergeant Said

Mulligan wrote:When my youngest sister was learning to talk, us older sibs, all at least six years older than her, would ask "What does Daddy say?" She would say "Shit" and there would be big laughs all around every time. I guess at some point that little show became unacceptable.

The wife thought that it would be cute to get a little cheerleader's dress-up outfit for the little girls. "Thought" that was, until they got coached through the obvious routine: "gimme an S! gimme an H!..." Actually, I still crack myself up over that one.

frank - up in grand blanc wrote:

Mulligan wrote:When my youngest sister was learning to talk, us older sibs, all at least six years older than her, would ask "What does Daddy say?" She would say "Shit" and there would be big laughs all around every time. I guess at some point that little show became unacceptable.

The wife thought that it would be cute to get a little cheerleader's dress-up outfit for the little girls. "Thought" that was, until they got coached through the obvious routine: "gimme an S! gimme an H!..." Actually, I still crack myself up over that one.

Mom would get pissed when her dad would have me recite, three times fast, "I slit a sheet, a sheet I slit."

For "Shit my Mom Says": "It's not rocket scientist".

Ma, that doesn't even make sense. Stop it. It's not rocket SCIENCE.

Doctor Detroit wrote:For "Shit my Mom Says": "It's not rocket scientist".

Ma, that doesn't even make sense. Stop it. It's not rocket SCIENCE.

My mom is far more quotable:

"He's not the brains of the operation." Most recently used referring to Brandon Inge

"You look like you're from Madison Heights." Last time I was wearing jorts and a Brazil soccer jersey. First time I was wearing heels and white socks ala License to Drive.

"They have more money than brains." My cousin with his two houses 2 miles apart fits this description.

"Follow the money." Politics.

"Do you want your father to find out about this?" - always said loud enough so that father just found out about this.

Doctor Detroit wrote:"Do you want your father to find out about this?" - always said loud enough so that father just found out about this.

That goes with the ever popular 'Just wait until your father gets home'.

middle aged female wrote:

Doctor Detroit wrote:"Do you want your father to find out about this?" - always said loud enough so that father just found out about this.

That goes with the ever popular 'Just wait until your father gets home'.

Mom never waited. She used a wooden spoon as soon as I deserved it. I'm assuming she thought, "Why should he have all the fun?"