Onward Christian Soldiers!

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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby middle aged female » Thu Jun 12, 2014 8:31 am

Regardless if pedophilia is a crime or not, aren't priests supposed to be celebate? Or does that only apply to women?
Archbishop quizzed in sexual abuse lawsuit claims he didn't know it was illegal for priests to have sex with children in the 1980s
Archbishop Robert Carlson was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in the 1980s
He has been deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona
In a testimony filmed last month he was asked whether he had known it was a crime for an adult to engage in sex with a child in the 1980s
'I'm not sure whether I knew it was a crime or not,' he responded
By DAILY MAIL REPORTER

A St Louis archbishop embroiled in a sexual abuse scandal has claimed he didn’t know it was illegal for priests to have sex with children in the 1980s, according to a court deposition released on Monday.
Archbishop Robert Carlson, who was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul at the time, was deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona.
In a testimony filmed last month and released by the St. Paul law firm Jeff Anderson & Associates, the Catholic archbishop was asked whether he had known it was a crime for an adult to engage in sex with a child.
Archbishop Robert Carlson, who was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in the 1980s, has been deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona
‘I’m not sure whether I knew it was a crime or not,’ Carlson responded. ‘I understand today it’s a crime.’
When asked when he first realized it was a crime for an adult - including priests - to have sex with a child, Carlson, 69, shook his head.
‘I don’t remember,’ he testified.

et according to other documents released by attorney Jeff Anderson, who is representing an alleged clergy abuse victim, Carlson showed clear knowledge that sexual abuse was a crime when discussing incidents with church officials during his time in Minnesota.
In a 1984 document, for example, Carlson wrote to the then-archbishop of St. Paul and Minneapolis - John R. Roach - about one victim of sexual abuse and mentioned that the statute of limitations for filing a claim would not expire for more than two years.

'I don't remember': When asked when he first realized it was a crime for an adult - including priests - to have sex with a child, Carlson, 69, shook his head
He also wrote that the parents of the victim were considering reporting the incident to the police.
Carlson’s role at the time was to investigate abuse claims. He admitted in his deposition that he never personally went to police, even when a clergy member admitted to inappropriate behavior.
In the testimony, Carlson responded 193 times that he did not recall abuse-related conversations from the 1980s to mid-1990s.
Carlson also said that even in 1996 he did not know that pedophilia was a disorder that couldn’t be cured.
“I did not know that, but as a pastor, I was becoming increasingly concerned,” Carlson said.
Carlson left the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in 1994, and eventually became St. Louis archbishop in 2009

The Archdiocese of St. Louis said in a statement on Monday that Carlson had given testimony ‘several times many years ago’ about the same allegations.
‘In this most recent deposition, while not being able to recall his knowledge of the law exactly as it was many decades ago, the Archbishop did make clear that he knows child sex abuse is a crime today,’ the statement said.
‘The question does not address the Archbishop’s moral stance on the sin of pedophilia, which has been that it is a most egregious offense.’
The trial against the Twin Cities archdiocese is set to begin in September.



Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... z34QXhhdAj
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby higgs1634 » Thu Jun 12, 2014 9:24 am

middle aged female wrote:Regardless if pedophilia is a crime or not, aren't priests supposed to be celebate? Or does that only apply to women?
Archbishop quizzed in sexual abuse lawsuit claims he didn't know it was illegal for priests to have sex with children in the 1980s
Archbishop Robert Carlson was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in the 1980s
He has been deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona
In a testimony filmed last month he was asked whether he had known it was a crime for an adult to engage in sex with a child in the 1980s
'I'm not sure whether I knew it was a crime or not,' he responded
By DAILY MAIL REPORTER

A St Louis archbishop embroiled in a sexual abuse scandal has claimed he didn’t know it was illegal for priests to have sex with children in the 1980s, according to a court deposition released on Monday.
Archbishop Robert Carlson, who was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul at the time, was deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona.
In a testimony filmed last month and released by the St. Paul law firm Jeff Anderson & Associates, the Catholic archbishop was asked whether he had known it was a crime for an adult to engage in sex with a child.
Archbishop Robert Carlson, who was chancellor of the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in the 1980s, has been deposed as part of a sexual abuse lawsuit in Minnesota involving the archdiocese and the Diocese of Winona
‘I’m not sure whether I knew it was a crime or not,’ Carlson responded. ‘I understand today it’s a crime.’
When asked when he first realized it was a crime for an adult - including priests - to have sex with a child, Carlson, 69, shook his head.
‘I don’t remember,’ he testified.

et according to other documents released by attorney Jeff Anderson, who is representing an alleged clergy abuse victim, Carlson showed clear knowledge that sexual abuse was a crime when discussing incidents with church officials during his time in Minnesota.
In a 1984 document, for example, Carlson wrote to the then-archbishop of St. Paul and Minneapolis - John R. Roach - about one victim of sexual abuse and mentioned that the statute of limitations for filing a claim would not expire for more than two years.

'I don't remember': When asked when he first realized it was a crime for an adult - including priests - to have sex with a child, Carlson, 69, shook his head
He also wrote that the parents of the victim were considering reporting the incident to the police.
Carlson’s role at the time was to investigate abuse claims. He admitted in his deposition that he never personally went to police, even when a clergy member admitted to inappropriate behavior.
In the testimony, Carlson responded 193 times that he did not recall abuse-related conversations from the 1980s to mid-1990s.
Carlson also said that even in 1996 he did not know that pedophilia was a disorder that couldn’t be cured.
“I did not know that, but as a pastor, I was becoming increasingly concerned,” Carlson said.
Carlson left the Archdiocese of Minneapolis and St. Paul in 1994, and eventually became St. Louis archbishop in 2009

The Archdiocese of St. Louis said in a statement on Monday that Carlson had given testimony ‘several times many years ago’ about the same allegations.
‘In this most recent deposition, while not being able to recall his knowledge of the law exactly as it was many decades ago, the Archbishop did make clear that he knows child sex abuse is a crime today,’ the statement said.
‘The question does not address the Archbishop’s moral stance on the sin of pedophilia, which has been that it is a most egregious offense.’
The trial against the Twin Cities archdiocese is set to begin in September.



Read more: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... z34QXhhdAj
Follow us: @MailOnline on Twitter | DailyMail on Facebook


Not just the celibacy thing, I'm reasonably sure there is also some guidance on bearing false witness.

It's never the crime... its the cover up. I will never understand the out and out lying and collusion by the senior leaders all over the world on this.
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby frank - up in grand blanc » Fri Jun 13, 2014 8:39 am

I'll change things up a bit, and because a thread dedicated to bashing Muslims probably violates one of the bylaws I'm putting this here.

In places under sharia law they routinely break out the lash, it seems. Details in the linked story and embedded video are not 100% clear, but the upshot is that woman in Sudan either has left Islam or refuses to convert to Islam so she's been sentenced to a spanking. But, as evidenced in the video, there are no safe/exit words in these spankings.

https://www.google.com/search?q=sudan+flogging&hl=en&gbv=2&prmd=ivns&source=univ&tbm=nws&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=Ge-aU7_eOpWzyATCkYLQAg&ved=0CBQQqAI

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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Sterile Whites 48313 » Fri Jun 13, 2014 8:59 am

frank - up in grand blanc wrote:I'll change things up a bit, and because a thread dedicated to bashing Muslims probably violates one of the bylaws I'm putting this here.

In places under sharia law they routinely break out the lash, it seems. Details in the linked story and embedded video are not 100% clear, but the upshot is that woman in Sudan either has left Islam or refuses to convert to Islam so she's been sentenced to a spanking. But, as evidenced in the video, there are no safe/exit words in these spankings.

https://www.google.com/search?q=sudan+flogging&hl=en&gbv=2&prmd=ivns&source=univ&tbm=nws&tbo=u&sa=X&ei=Ge-aU7_eOpWzyATCkYLQAg&ved=0CBQQqAI


Safe words only apply to "mutually agreed" spankings/floggings...
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Amadeus » Fri Jun 13, 2014 11:09 am

Single mothers were forcibly sterilised in Sweden. We don't hear much about that.


What about the Swedish welfare paradise? Surely there single mothers and their children were treated in an enlightened manner?

In Sweden the 'solution' was to sterilise unmarried mothers. They also made some have abortions. They also had institutions in which abuse was widespread. The policy of sterilising unmarried mothers was explicitly a Social Democratic policy and lasted from the mid-1930s until the mid-1970s.


See more at: http://www.independent.ie/opinion/colum ... 8Gk0Z.dpuf
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby middle aged female » Fri Jun 13, 2014 11:48 am

Amadeus wrote:
Single mothers were forcibly sterilised in Sweden. We don't hear much about that.


What about the Swedish welfare paradise? Surely there single mothers and their children were treated in an enlightened manner?

In Sweden the 'solution' was to sterilise unmarried mothers. They also made some have abortions. They also had institutions in which abuse was widespread. The policy of sterilising unmarried mothers was explicitly a Social Democratic policy and lasted from the mid-1930s until the mid-1970s.


See more at: http://www.independent.ie/opinion/colum ... 8Gk0Z.dpuf

I never said they weren't treated poorly everywhere else; I just think there should have been a bit more Christian charity from those who purport to be Brides of Christ. I doubt he would have approved, but I'm sure he's forgiven.
One can defend by saying everyone else did the same thing; doesn't make it the right thing to have done.
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Shark » Fri Jun 20, 2014 6:18 pm

A second man was arrested Friday as part of a Battle Creek investigation into manufacturing child pornography and having sex with minors.

John Balyo, 35, of Caledonia was arrested in Gaylord as part of a joint investigation by U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, the Battle Creek Police Department and Michigan State Police.

Balyo, an on-air personality at WCSG-FM, a Christian radio station associated with Cornerstone University in Grand Rapids, was arrested on a state charge of first-degree criminal sexual conduct, according to Khaalid Walls, a spokesman for ICE.

Walls said Friday investigators are alleging that Balyo had sexual encounters with minors in Battle Creek.


What a creeper: http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3489/321 ... 9137_b.jpg
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Mad Max » Mon Jul 07, 2014 8:22 pm

Christian Anti-Masturbation Group’s Mascot Arrested For Public Masturbation

Image

Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The organization recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of masturbation.

Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is 35-year-old Paul Horner, was arrested on Sunday at Metta Yoga in Phoenix after employees notified police about a man with no pants on peering through office windows.

Tom Downey with the Phoenix Police Department, who took Horner into custody, spoke with Arizona news station ABC 15 about the arrest. “We thought at first he was possibly intoxicated or mentally unstable, ya know, talking about children and how deadly it is for them to masturbate. Telling us he was in town with a Christian organization aimed at talking with children about the dangers of masturbation. Saying things like, ‘They need to stop playing on the Devil’s playground, stop pounding their Devil stick or ringing the Devil’s doorbell’,” Downey said. “Things got very odd when Horner broke down crying in the back of my cruiser and began making noises, kind of like a fish, saying that he believed himself to be an actual dolphin. It was really strange.”

Lonnie Childs who is president and founder of Stop Masturbation Now spoke with reporters about the future of the organization after this recent setback. “Thanks to your tax dollars, Fappy has helped tens of thousands of adults and children learn to live a masturbation-free lifestyle. During his visits to schools around the world, Fappy has collected thousands of signatures from children promising to never masturbate; he has done great things,” Childs said. “It’s a shame how the media is portraying Fappy right now. Paul Horner is a great man. He’s passionate about his work, he loves being Fappy, he loves the kids. They even have a nickname for him, they call him the tickle monster. But now, all of that is possibly ruined by some trumped-up charges by the Phoenix five-oh, such a shame. I have activated my prayer app and I ask each and every one of you to keep Fappy in your prayers until this incident is resolved. Praise Fappy!”

Horner told CNN by phone that he plans to make the most of his imprisonment. “I want to apologize to all my amazing fans out there, I love and miss you all,” Horner said. “You have my word that I will make the most of this bad situation. Jail is just a hotbed for self-rape and immoral acts. I plan to do everything in my power to stop the masturbation currently happening in this jail.”

On the group’s Facebook page this morning, news was posted of the arrest.

I have some bad news everyone. I want you to hear it here first before the media outlets spread their lies about the incident. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is Paul Horner, was arrested yesterday by Phoenix police. Our lawyers tell us he is being charged with public masturbation, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. He is currently being held at the 4th Avenue Jail in Phoenix, Arizona until a bond is set by a judge, this happening hopefully soon. Please don’t jump to any conclusions about this until we have all the evidence. Please keep Fappy in your prayers during this difficult time.


Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin and Stop Masturbation Now are federally funded programs designed to teach both children and adults about the dangers and consequences of masturbation. For more information or if you would like the group to visit your child’s school call (785) 273-0325.

http://nationalreport.net/fappy-the-dolphin-arrested-for-public-masturbation/

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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Sterile Whites 48313 » Mon Jul 07, 2014 8:35 pm

Mad Max wrote:
Christian Anti-Masturbation Group’s Mascot Arrested For Public Masturbation

Image

Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The organization recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of masturbation.

Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is 35-year-old Paul Horner, was arrested on Sunday at Metta Yoga in Phoenix after employees notified police about a man with no pants on peering through office windows.

Tom Downey with the Phoenix Police Department, who took Horner into custody, spoke with Arizona news station ABC 15 about the arrest. “We thought at first he was possibly intoxicated or mentally unstable, ya know, talking about children and how deadly it is for them to masturbate. Telling us he was in town with a Christian organization aimed at talking with children about the dangers of masturbation. Saying things like, ‘They need to stop playing on the Devil’s playground, stop pounding their Devil stick or ringing the Devil’s doorbell’,” Downey said. “Things got very odd when Horner broke down crying in the back of my cruiser and began making noises, kind of like a fish, saying that he believed himself to be an actual dolphin. It was really strange.”

Lonnie Childs who is president and founder of Stop Masturbation Now spoke with reporters about the future of the organization after this recent setback. “Thanks to your tax dollars, Fappy has helped tens of thousands of adults and children learn to live a masturbation-free lifestyle. During his visits to schools around the world, Fappy has collected thousands of signatures from children promising to never masturbate; he has done great things,” Childs said. “It’s a shame how the media is portraying Fappy right now. Paul Horner is a great man. He’s passionate about his work, he loves being Fappy, he loves the kids. They even have a nickname for him, they call him the tickle monster. But now, all of that is possibly ruined by some trumped-up charges by the Phoenix five-oh, such a shame. I have activated my prayer app and I ask each and every one of you to keep Fappy in your prayers until this incident is resolved. Praise Fappy!”

Horner told CNN by phone that he plans to make the most of his imprisonment. “I want to apologize to all my amazing fans out there, I love and miss you all,” Horner said. “You have my word that I will make the most of this bad situation. Jail is just a hotbed for self-rape and immoral acts. I plan to do everything in my power to stop the masturbation currently happening in this jail.”

On the group’s Facebook page this morning, news was posted of the arrest.

I have some bad news everyone. I want you to hear it here first before the media outlets spread their lies about the incident. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is Paul Horner, was arrested yesterday by Phoenix police. Our lawyers tell us he is being charged with public masturbation, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. He is currently being held at the 4th Avenue Jail in Phoenix, Arizona until a bond is set by a judge, this happening hopefully soon. Please don’t jump to any conclusions about this until we have all the evidence. Please keep Fappy in your prayers during this difficult time.


Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin and Stop Masturbation Now are federally funded programs designed to teach both children and adults about the dangers and consequences of masturbation. For more information or if you would like the group to visit your child’s school call (785) 273-0325.

http://nationalreport.net/fappy-the-dolphin-arrested-for-public-masturbation/



I so love "The Onion"... Fappy? Bwahahahahahahaha!
Just another run of the mill suburban white devil, with an "Assault" weapon. Molon Labe.
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Mad Max » Mon Jul 07, 2014 10:12 pm

Sterile Whites 48313 wrote:
Mad Max wrote:
Christian Anti-Masturbation Group’s Mascot Arrested For Public Masturbation

Image

Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The organization recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of masturbation.

Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is 35-year-old Paul Horner, was arrested on Sunday at Metta Yoga in Phoenix after employees notified police about a man with no pants on peering through office windows.

Tom Downey with the Phoenix Police Department, who took Horner into custody, spoke with Arizona news station ABC 15 about the arrest. “We thought at first he was possibly intoxicated or mentally unstable, ya know, talking about children and how deadly it is for them to masturbate. Telling us he was in town with a Christian organization aimed at talking with children about the dangers of masturbation. Saying things like, ‘They need to stop playing on the Devil’s playground, stop pounding their Devil stick or ringing the Devil’s doorbell’,” Downey said. “Things got very odd when Horner broke down crying in the back of my cruiser and began making noises, kind of like a fish, saying that he believed himself to be an actual dolphin. It was really strange.”

Lonnie Childs who is president and founder of Stop Masturbation Now spoke with reporters about the future of the organization after this recent setback. “Thanks to your tax dollars, Fappy has helped tens of thousands of adults and children learn to live a masturbation-free lifestyle. During his visits to schools around the world, Fappy has collected thousands of signatures from children promising to never masturbate; he has done great things,” Childs said. “It’s a shame how the media is portraying Fappy right now. Paul Horner is a great man. He’s passionate about his work, he loves being Fappy, he loves the kids. They even have a nickname for him, they call him the tickle monster. But now, all of that is possibly ruined by some trumped-up charges by the Phoenix five-oh, such a shame. I have activated my prayer app and I ask each and every one of you to keep Fappy in your prayers until this incident is resolved. Praise Fappy!”

Horner told CNN by phone that he plans to make the most of his imprisonment. “I want to apologize to all my amazing fans out there, I love and miss you all,” Horner said. “You have my word that I will make the most of this bad situation. Jail is just a hotbed for self-rape and immoral acts. I plan to do everything in my power to stop the masturbation currently happening in this jail.”

On the group’s Facebook page this morning, news was posted of the arrest.

I have some bad news everyone. I want you to hear it here first before the media outlets spread their lies about the incident. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is Paul Horner, was arrested yesterday by Phoenix police. Our lawyers tell us he is being charged with public masturbation, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. He is currently being held at the 4th Avenue Jail in Phoenix, Arizona until a bond is set by a judge, this happening hopefully soon. Please don’t jump to any conclusions about this until we have all the evidence. Please keep Fappy in your prayers during this difficult time.


Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin and Stop Masturbation Now are federally funded programs designed to teach both children and adults about the dangers and consequences of masturbation. For more information or if you would like the group to visit your child’s school call (785) 273-0325.

http://nationalreport.net/fappy-the-dolphin-arrested-for-public-masturbation/



I so love "The Onion"... Fappy? Bwahahahahahahaha!


I once handed a coworker an Onion story I printed out titled "Liberal Activist Judge Cancels Christmas". He got 2/3 of the way through the story before he realized it was fake.

Why'd you have to ruin my fun so early?
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Sterile Whites 48313 » Tue Jul 08, 2014 7:23 am

Mad Max wrote:
Sterile Whites 48313 wrote:
Mad Max wrote:
Christian Anti-Masturbation Group’s Mascot Arrested For Public Masturbation

Image

Phoenix, AZ — In an ironic twist of a fate, a mascot for a Christian anti-masturbation group was arrested Sunday for masturbating in public. The organization recently finished a federally funded 31-city nationwide school tour which it says focused on educating both children and parents about the dangerous consequences of masturbation.

Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is 35-year-old Paul Horner, was arrested on Sunday at Metta Yoga in Phoenix after employees notified police about a man with no pants on peering through office windows.

Tom Downey with the Phoenix Police Department, who took Horner into custody, spoke with Arizona news station ABC 15 about the arrest. “We thought at first he was possibly intoxicated or mentally unstable, ya know, talking about children and how deadly it is for them to masturbate. Telling us he was in town with a Christian organization aimed at talking with children about the dangers of masturbation. Saying things like, ‘They need to stop playing on the Devil’s playground, stop pounding their Devil stick or ringing the Devil’s doorbell’,” Downey said. “Things got very odd when Horner broke down crying in the back of my cruiser and began making noises, kind of like a fish, saying that he believed himself to be an actual dolphin. It was really strange.”

Lonnie Childs who is president and founder of Stop Masturbation Now spoke with reporters about the future of the organization after this recent setback. “Thanks to your tax dollars, Fappy has helped tens of thousands of adults and children learn to live a masturbation-free lifestyle. During his visits to schools around the world, Fappy has collected thousands of signatures from children promising to never masturbate; he has done great things,” Childs said. “It’s a shame how the media is portraying Fappy right now. Paul Horner is a great man. He’s passionate about his work, he loves being Fappy, he loves the kids. They even have a nickname for him, they call him the tickle monster. But now, all of that is possibly ruined by some trumped-up charges by the Phoenix five-oh, such a shame. I have activated my prayer app and I ask each and every one of you to keep Fappy in your prayers until this incident is resolved. Praise Fappy!”

Horner told CNN by phone that he plans to make the most of his imprisonment. “I want to apologize to all my amazing fans out there, I love and miss you all,” Horner said. “You have my word that I will make the most of this bad situation. Jail is just a hotbed for self-rape and immoral acts. I plan to do everything in my power to stop the masturbation currently happening in this jail.”

On the group’s Facebook page this morning, news was posted of the arrest.

I have some bad news everyone. I want you to hear it here first before the media outlets spread their lies about the incident. Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin, whose real name is Paul Horner, was arrested yesterday by Phoenix police. Our lawyers tell us he is being charged with public masturbation, resisting arrest and disorderly conduct. He is currently being held at the 4th Avenue Jail in Phoenix, Arizona until a bond is set by a judge, this happening hopefully soon. Please don’t jump to any conclusions about this until we have all the evidence. Please keep Fappy in your prayers during this difficult time.


Fappy The Anti-Masturbation Dolphin and Stop Masturbation Now are federally funded programs designed to teach both children and adults about the dangers and consequences of masturbation. For more information or if you would like the group to visit your child’s school call (785) 273-0325.

http://nationalreport.net/fappy-the-dolphin-arrested-for-public-masturbation/



I so love "The Onion"... Fappy? Bwahahahahahahaha!


I once handed a coworker an Onion story I printed out titled "Liberal Activist Judge Cancels Christmas". He got 2/3 of the way through the story before he realized it was fake.

Why'd you have to ruin my fun so early?


"Fappy" gave it away...sorry.
Just another run of the mill suburban white devil, with an "Assault" weapon. Molon Labe.
.
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Mad Max » Sat Jun 27, 2015 3:45 pm

Single Christian Lady Bristol "Screw As I Say, Not As I Screw" Palin is Pregnant Again



Big news, tweets Bristol Palin, along with a link that takes you here:

I wanted you guys to be the first to know that I am pregnant. Honestly, I’ve been trying my hardest to keep my chin up on this one. At the end of the day there’s nothing I can’t do with God by my side, and I know I am fully capable of handling anything that is put in front of me with dignity and grace. Life moves on no matter what. So no matter how you feel, you get up, get dressed, show up, and never give up. When life gets tough, there is no other option but to get tougher.


This will be Bristol Palin's second child. This one is either by her second ex-fiance or some poor man to be named later. There's more from Bristol here, if you're so inclined and you have a high tolerance for platitudes (I'm not and I don't), and here are three things I gotta get off my chest...

1. If Bristol Palin's last name was "Obama" the whole Hee Haw gang at Fox News would spend half of every day for the next nine months telling us that Bristol Obama has terrible parents—"Maybe Michelle should be less concerned with what your kids are eating and more concerned with what her kids are doing!"—and the other half of the day pretending to fret over the terrible example that Bristol Obama was setting for other African American women and girls. But unplanned pregnancies and kids in fatherless homes and two different children by two different fathers? IOIYAR.

2. Does anyone remember what Bristol Palin had to say back when Barack Obama endorsed marriage equality for the first time as president? (He had previously endorsed gay marriage back when he was a candidate for state office in Illinois in 1996.) President Obama told ABC News that Sasha and Malia's perspective had informed his own. Both of his daughters had friends with gay and lesbian parents. It didn't "make sense to them," the president said, "that somehow their friends’ parents would be treated differently."

Here's what Bristol Palin had to say about that:

While it’s great to listen to your kids’ ideas, there’s also a time when dads simply need to be dads. In this case, it would’ve been helpful for him to explain to Malia and Sasha that while her friends parents are no doubt lovely people, that’s not a reason to change thousands of years of thinking about marriage. Or that—as great as her friends may be—we know that in general kids do better growing up in a mother/father home. Ideally, fathers help shape their kids’ worldview.


The irony here? Besides that Bristol Palin opposes same-sex marriage because she believes that kids—other than her own—need to grow up mother/father homes? We now know that Obama's story about Malia and Sasha is bullshit. Both probably have friends with gay and lesbian parents—they live in White House, after all, and they go to Sidwell Friends—but seeing as Obama was for marriage equality all along it was Obama who shaped his daughters' views on marriage equality and not the other way around.

So, hey, it looks like Obama was doing what you wanted him to do, Bristol: He wasn't listening to his kids. He was shaping their worldview. Happy now?

3. Here you go, Bristol—not for right now, of course. For right after your next child is born into a fatherless home. You're welcome.

4. Bonus thing: you have to watch Bristol Palin's abstinence ed PSA at the top of the post. Holy crap.

UPDATE: Wonkette rounds up some more choice quotes from B. Palin, including...

[Oprah] Winfrey told Bristol she “kind of bristled” when she learned the teen recently told In Touch magazine, “I’m not going to have sex until I’m married. I can guarantee it” and wondered if such a promise was “realistic.” […]

“I’m just wondering if that’s a realistic goal,” said Winfrey.

“It’s a realistic goal for myself,” replied Bristol.


http://www.thestranger.com/blogs/slog/2015/06/25/22452038/bristol-palin-is-pregnant
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby The Suburban Avenger » Mon Jun 29, 2015 12:33 am

Her blog post is going to survive, in some form, forever on the Internets ... I'm sure her progeny will love reading one day that mom was, um, less than delighted by their impending arrival.

Reason No. 77,001 for people to live privately.
My hand to God, she's gonna be at Carnegie Hall. But you - I'll let you have her now at the old price, OK? Which is, which is anything you wanna give me. Anything at all.

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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby Doctor Detroit » Mon Jun 29, 2015 10:24 am

The Suburban Avenger wrote:Her blog post is going to survive, in some form, forever on the Internets ... I'm sure her progeny will love reading one day that mom was, um, less than delighted by their impending arrival.

Reason No. 77,001 for people to live privately.


If these "good christian" fuckwads would worry about their own genitals instead of what everybody else is doing with theirs, they'd find themselves in 100% less hypocritical situations.
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Re: Onward Christian Soldiers!

Postby middle aged female » Mon Jun 29, 2015 10:45 am

Doctor Detroit wrote:
The Suburban Avenger wrote:Her blog post is going to survive, in some form, forever on the Internets ... I'm sure her progeny will love reading one day that mom was, um, less than delighted by their impending arrival.

Reason No. 77,001 for people to live privately.


If these "good christian" fuckwads would worry about their own genitals instead of what everybody else is doing with theirs, they'd find themselves in 100% less hypocritical situations.

Girl would also be better off if her mother would quit running her mouth

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